I’m embarking on a personal journey, and I’d love for you to join me. Consider it an inner-self road trip with lots of interesting pit stops along the way.
I recently spent 4 days in Ojai, California at the Elevate Mastermind Retreat with my coach, Molly Mahar of Stratejoy, and 12 other women who are going through big transitions in 2014. Fair warning: I’ll be talking about this group a lot in the future.
I know it sounds cheesy, but this retreat was truly life changing, and the experience continues all year long with virtual retreats and more coaching to push me out of my comfort zone.
So why am I telling you this?
As one of my followers, you can expect big—no, wait—MASSIVE changes this year from me and the products and services I provide to you to help you get the most out of your life.
These changes are still under wraps and strictly top secret (shhhh!), but what I can share with you is that I’m doing my own version of life editing…just like how I help my clients clean up their lives.
Now, a lot of people (that is, other coaches) have told me that a life coach needs to represent the “After” that potential clients are looking for. A life coach is supposed to have her shit together because no one wants to hire a coach who’s not perfect, right?
Also, coaches aren’t supposed to say bad words like shit. Oops.
But let’s get real. I’m not perfect, and I’m going through some major transitions. Heck, that’s why I have a life coach of my own!
I’m going out on a limb here and saying that I think you want me to be REAL.
The most-viewed posts on my website are the ones where I’ve opened up and talked about the hard stuff, such as my suicide attempt.
As I edit my life this year, I’ll be sharing my successes and challenges with my business, my weight, my money, my marriage, and more.
And one of the first things I want to talk about is my lack of friends. I’ve mentioned before that I have no real girl friends that I see regularly or hang out with on the weekends.
My first challenge in my life-editing quest is to get out of the damn house and make some friends already!
But there was something I had do first.
If you’ve gone through the Editor Session program, you know that you can’t add in the good things that are missing in your life until you delete the bad stuff that’s holding you back.
I had a lot of negative influences in my life in the form of Facebook friends, people I followed through email newsletters, other blogs, etc. Not all of these people were nasty to me (though some were), but for whatever reason, I didn’t feel good about myself when I read their statuses or received their newest blog posts in my inbox.
I spent last week editing out these online acquaintances, frenemies, Debbie Downers, and one-uppers. All in all, I unfollowed or deleted more than 100 people from my online life.
Now my Facebook stream is full of people I actually care about—and ones I’ve met in person! I’m only receiving email newsletters from people who add value to my life. The blogs I read build me up instead of making me feel like a loser.
My point is that it was easy for me to fool myself into believing that I had friends when I really only had pixels and “Likes.” It might not be the same for you, but those online “friendships” aren’t in line with where I’m going and who I want to be this year.
I feel so light and alive after cleaning up my online connections!
Honestly, I expected some of these people to email me and demand to know why I unsubscribed from their lists or aren’t commenting on their oh-so-important Facebook statuses…but so far, no one has.
Maybe that’s another lesson for me to learn: I might be negatively affected by these online peeps, but they don’t seem to notice me at all.
The world doesn’t revolve around me—go figure!
Here’s my challenge for you.
Ask yourself what you’re getting out of your social media accounts, blogs you follow, and online communities.
- Do you feel better or worse about yourself when you interact with those people online?
- Are you following anyone who triggers your anger or makes you feel jealous?
- How would you feel if you cut these toxic people out of your online life?
- Do you have a strong, supportive group of friends that you see regularly in person?
- How can you foster offline friendships in your life?
I have so much more life editing to do, but I gotta say, deleting these bad online friendships and refocusing on in-person relationships is already making me feel like a million bucks.
Do you expect me to be the “perfect coach” or do you want to follow me through my personal struggles?
How do you balance online and offline friendships?
In the comments below, share your tips for connecting with real live people.